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Bereavement & Loss

Bereavement is the loss of someone important to us, and our experiences around this. In our sessions we will explore how we can move towards an acceptance of loss and how we can adjust our lives accordingly. We will explore the grief process and what the loss means for us. The grief process may not truly begin for a period of time, sometimes years, after the event, but nonetheless be as raw and painful as at the time of the event.

 

Bereavement may bring up difficult emotions and thoughts around our relationship or experiences connected to those we have lost, and we will explore these processes in a careful/considered and non judgemental environment.

 

Your experience of loss is unique to you, your grief journey is yours to understand and engage in, I will try to understand this and provide a supportive, patient attitude to your explorations.

 

We will explore how we do not ’move on’ or ‘get over’ loss but accomodate the loss in to our lives and explore the ways in which we can take our loved ones with us, if we wish.

How bereavement and loss affect us

 

Emotionally Bereavement and loss may affect us in many ways:

 

We may feel empty, lost, in pain, angry, frustrated, depressed, sudden waves of emotion, lack of purpose, loss of identity.

 

Physically we may experience poor sleep patterns, lack of appetite or overeating, poor concentration at home or in work, lethargy.

 

Through grief we may engage in negative actions such as drinking, taking drugs, isolation, taking things out on others, reckless behaviour and violent behaviour to others or yourself e.g. self harm.

 

All of the above may sit with us under the surface for years, then suddenly appear, triggered by a recent loss, a song, smell, or location, any of these can cause the sudden emergence of emotions which can be overwhelming or confusing.

 

We can also feel loss before a bereavement has occurred - this is anticipatory loss, and can occur around issues concerning a loved one's age, lifestyle or terminal illness.

 

Loss can also be experienced in relation to the breakdown of a relationship, loss of career/job or moving to a new environment.

 

Existential questions of self may also occur through loss , our identity, how we see ourselves or how we believe others see us can leave us feeling unsure, anxious, confused and upset; all these can be natural reactions to loss.

 

Suicide

 

A loved one taking there own life can be a particularly difficult and complex experience emotionally for family and friends. Questions seem to be everywhere - why did they choose this action, could I have seen the signs, could i have prevented it, why didn’t others see or prevent it. These questions can lead to feelings of anger, frustration or being let down, the blaming of self or others.

 

With all loss and bereavement the journey to understanding what it means for us can be difficult. Most importantly it is seeing that there can be an after, a place where we can experience this understanding as a form of peace.

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